(ALMOST) EVERYONE'S DOING IT

"Is it ok to have premarital sex?" That is a common question among teens and engaged couples. In your mind, you are probably weighing the pros and cons of premarital sex. On the positive side of the scale, there is acceptance from your peers, hope for pleasure, and the fulfillment of sexual desires.

The negative side of the scale carries the weights of morals, fear of pregnancy or disease, and guilt. How do these scales balance? What is the right decision?

A surprising new study shows Religious youths are having premarital sex and abortions as much (or more) than unreligious people.

Eighty percent of young, unmarried Christians have had sex. Two-thirds have been sexually active in the last year. Even though, according to a recent Gallup poll, 76 percent of evangelicals believe sex outside of marriage is morally wrong.

Grace Kay like other believers planned to save sex for marriage. She made it through high school with her virginity intact, but when she was 20 she started having sex with her college boyfriend.

“I was so enamored with my first boyfriend,” Kay says. “He was the first guy I really fell in love with, and suddenly all the barriers came down and I was way too vulnerable.”

Kay believes better role models may have helped her abstain, but even her Christian friends were having sex.

“It seemed everyone in my life, older and younger, had ‘done it,’ ” Kay says. “In fact, I waited longer than most people I knew and longer than both of my sisters, even though we were all Christians and came from a good home.”

Kay continued to have sex with her college boyfriend for years as they maintained an on-again/off -again relationship.

Stories like this aren’t often heard in church, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t common.

In fact, a recent study reveals that 88 percent of unmarried young adults (ages 18-29) are having sex.

The same study, conducted by The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, reveals the number doesn’t drop much among Christians. Of those surveyed who self-identify as “evangelical,” 80 percent say they have had sex. So much for true love waits.

Why is this? Yes, sex is pleasurable, but in God's view, the primary purpose of sex is not recreation, but rather re-creation. In other words, sex is for reproduction. God does not limit sex to married couples to rob pleasure from those who are unmarried. Rather, God commands against premarital sex in order to protect unmarried people from unwanted pregnancies, from children born to parents who do not want them, and to protect children from parents who are not prepared for them. 

Imagine, for a moment, a world without premarital sex. There would be no sexually-transmitted diseases, there would be no un-wed mothers, there would be no unwanted pregnancies, there would be no abortions, etc.

Whatever Happened to Abstinence must be rekindled she concluded.